You and I

Recently, we visited with Buddy's birthmom. It is always an interesting experience. Open adoptions have been shown to be the healthiest for adopted children, but I wouldn't say they are the easiest for the adoptive family or for the birthmom, especially in the first few months after the baby's birth. It seems especially hard for us because we grew close to Buddy's birthmom, C., this past summer when she stayed with us. Now, even though it would probably be easiest for her if she didn't see Buddy very often, it is hard to tell her no when she asks us to visit. We just keep praying that she will heal quickly from her loss and be able to move on.

While we were visiting with her, C. asked me if Buddy would love her like he would love me as his mother. What a tough question to answer! I told her that she would always hold a special place in his heart as his birthmother that no one else can ever be to him. She was the one who chose to carry him for nine months in her womb and give birth to him. However, she can never hold the role of mother that I will be to him. I recently came across a quote that explains our separate, yet special roles perfectly:

He is mine in a way that he will never be hers,

yet he is hers in a way that he will never be mine,

and so together, WE are motherhood.

~Desha Wood

I wrote a similar poem in an attempt to explain our two roles in my own mind.

You and I

You will always be his birthmom

The one who gave him life before birth

Feeding him

Loving him

Praying for him

Dreaming

Of what he could become

Hopes for him growing like an ocean wave

You gave him

Long fingers

Silky hair

And a dimpled smile

You will hold a special role in his life

And a piece of his heart

Forever and always

I will always be his mom

The one who gave him life after birth

Nurturing him

Loving him

Praying for him

Dreaming

Of what he could become

Hopes for him rising and ebbing like the ocean tide

I will give him

A joy for life

A love of God

And the ability to learn from his mistakes

I will hold a special role in his life

And a piece of his heart

Forever and always

Our newest addition...surprise!

Yes, you may be surprised to hear that we have a new little addition to our family. No, he is not from Ethiopia. We still plan to adopt from Ethiopia, but we will remain on the wait list until our new little guy is six months old. I will call him Buddy, as I've chosen nicknames for all of us for safety/privacy reasons. We first heard about Buddy's birthmother back in May, but we chose not to post about him because there were too many uncertainties about him joining our family. Even now, it seems surreal that he is with us because there were so many miracles that would have to happen in order for him to be with us. We know for a fact he was meant to be with us because only God could have brought it all about! His story is amazing and I hope to blog it in full soon, but this will be the shortened version for now.

Buddy was born Nov. 5th and was 8 pounds and 20 1/2 inches long. I had the privilege of watching the birth and being able to nurse Buddy soon after he was born. We stayed in the hospital for a few days as he had high biliruben levels and had to be under the lights. We brought him home on Nov. 9th to join our family forever!! We are so in love with our sweet guy and are loving being an adoptive family at last, even though it was not in a way we expected. We are completing an open adoption and we feel privileged to know Buddy's birthmother and to be able to see her regularly.

This past month has been an adjustment to having "twins" and double the diapers and feedings. :) We are beginning to feel like we have a routine that they are both (mostly) on, but doubling our number of kids in the past couple of months has definitely added new meaning to the word "busy." :)

Our "twin" boys (seven weeks apart)

We'll post Buddy's full story and more pictures soon!

Organic Valley photoshoot

I don't know that I've mentioned before, but our dairy is organic and we belong to the Organic Valley co-op. Organic Valley milk is sold nationwide, but if you live in the Pacific Northwest, chances are you've had some of our milk if you buy Organic Valley. OV milk is kept within regional pools to decrease shipping costs and to mantain a shorter farm-to-table time.

Anyway, Organic Valley likes to promote its products with real pictures of its farmers. This past summer they sent a photographer to do a photoshoot of our family. We recently got the pictures back and they turned out great! Here are a few of my favorites...

 All images © 2010 Anna Campbell. Used with permission.

Introducing...

the newest member of our family! I know, I know this post is long overdue, but we've been adjusting to busier days and sleepless nights once again.

Our little Boy Blue was born on September 18th--four days after his duedate. He was 8 lb. 4 oz. and 21 inches long. What fun it's been to have a baby in the house again! I spend all my spare time just holding him and staring at his perfect little face. How could I have forgotten how cute those little baby squeaks and coos are?

It's been fun to watch FarmDad with this little guy. Apparently, the third time's the charm, because although FarmDad loved holding and playing with Miss Smiley and Tractor Boy when they were babies, he is so totally at ease with Boy Blue. As soon as he comes in from work, he swoops him up and starts talking to him. So precious.

Brother and sister absolutely adore baby, of course. Usually, they have to be told that he has gotten enough kisses and hugs for a while.

Bathtime...

One month old...

In other Farm Family news...

Miss Smiley started soccer this year!

She loves it and has improved a lot since starting. At the beginning, she would run and hop randomly around the field kicking the ball whichever direction she was already facing. Now she understands the basics and she has gotten much more aggressive and competitive (thanks to lots of pep talks from Dad the coach!) She has even made a couple of goals in the last few games. Way to go, sweet girl!!

We have also started homeschooling--a little late because of baby's arrival, but better late than never!! Miss Smiley is in kindergarten and Tractor Boy is in preschool, but so far I've just been teaching them together. Today we had fun working on writing the letters of the alphabet in chocolate pudding...

The taste test...

The letter C...